Listen To The Audio Recording Of This Message
My name is Sue and I am the mom of three. My oldest son, who is 22, is gay and I am bisexual. I came out later in life, at the age of 46, after being married for 19 years. My purpose in sharing this is to offer some peace, hope, and love this holiday season, along with being here for you, as your Holiday Mom.
I remember the holiday season was upon us, shortly after I came out. It was a time of tension and a lot of negative feelings experienced not only by me, but also by my family members, in-laws and my partner’s family. I felt a lot of guilt and shame, because I could see my decision had hurt people. It took them some time to see that in what they thought was “a selfish decision,” I was being honest and fair. It wasn’t right for me, my husband, or our kids, to go on living the life I had, when I had realized the truth and got to the point of accepting who I was. First, I had to be honest with myself, and then with those people I loved. The freedom I felt for being honest, was indescribable, but so was the pain I felt from knowing I hurt the people I love the most.
It’s been six years since that holiday season. Many things have changed and with time, my son was able to come to accept his sexuality and be open about it shortly after I did. My partner and I both went through divorces, bought a home together. Two months later, my ex and dad of my kids passed away suddenly, three years ago. Needless to say, it didn’t feel much like Christmas that year either, but it still came and somehow we made it through.
This holiday season, I have been with my partner for five years. With time, our families have come to accept our love and see that we are in a committed relationship, just like many of their own. As for my son, he has also been “reborn.” It hasn’t been easy, but I believe in him and love him more every day for wanting to be who he is and being okay with that!
What I want to share is that no matter who you are, what you have been through, and what you are going through, I am praying for you right now and I love you! You are special and a beautiful child of God whose love for you is great and can overcome anything you are facing. Deaths and rebirths are a part of life’s rhythm. I know I experienced “death” and “rebirth” when I came out. Death of who I thought I was, death of marriage, death of the family unit that was reality for all those years. Although it was rough in the beginning, with time, the honesty brought new beginnings and “rebirth,” peace and serenity, not only for me but for the family as well.
As I look forward to the holidays this year, you are in my heart. My wish for you is peace and serenity at Thanksgiving, Christmastime, and every second of every day from now on. You are in my heart and in my prayers and know that you have my unconditional love, always! I am forever grateful for this opportunity, thank you so much!
Your Holiday Mom Sue