Holiday Mom: Theresa

Theresa Ramirez Your Holiday MomHello Dear Heart,

It’s me, your holiday mom. I just wanted to write and let you know that I’ve been thinking about you a lot this holiday season.

I wanted to let you know I have a snug, cozy spot saved on the couch for you. You can come snuggle up and we’ll watch our favorite holiday movies. We’ll make a day long comfy marathon out of it. I’ll make hot chocolate and popcorn. And who knows, if we feel crazy we can get out the ice cream, too!

And while we watch those movies I want to give you a great big hug and tell you that you are amazing. You are inspiring (you’ve inspired me!). And you, my dear, are one of my absolute favorite people on this planet. I love you dearly.

I want to give you all of the love and support I can possibly give to you, because you deserve it. And I am so very sorry if you are not getting that from the people that are closest to you.

I can’t tell you what it feels like to be LGBTQ or how difficult that journey can be. I know you are faced with judgment and persecution. Even one instance of it is far too much in my opinion.

I can tell you what it feels like to be thrown away by the people that are supposed to care about you the most. To not be accepted for who you are, or for the pieces of you that simply cannot be changed. Once upon a time I was disowned for my beliefs. To be treated that way – it leaves your head spinning and a great big hole in your heart. But I want you to know that the hole can heal. People can be forgiven, especially for acting in harsh ways when faced with something they don’t understand and fear. They can be forgiven for how they react when we can’t, and won’t conform to the way they originally saw us or even want us to be.

This holiday season, I want to give you something that helped me (and still does) to heal that hole. To feel good about who I am, and to find my inner power again.

I recite manifestos. And today I have one to gift to you. I hope you’ll lock it up inside of you and call upon the words whenever you need it.

The “I Am Amazing” Manifesto:

I am an amazing person.

I am not defined by labels.

Nor what others think of me.

I will not be put into a box.

I, and I alone determine the terms of my defining.

I am defined by my heart.

By my goodness.

By my kind actions.

By each and every fascinating layer that makes me who I am.

Because I am an interesting person.

I am incredible.

I am unique and remarkable just the way I am.

This is me.

This is my path.

I walk it firmly.

I walk it proudly.

This is who I am.

And I’m not apologizing for any of it

Because I love myself.

And I am loved.

I am supported.

I am cherished.

My dear, I hope you like it. I hope you will hold those words in your heart. I hope when you recite them that you believe them, deep down to your core. Because you want to know something? I believe those things about you. So very much.

Here’s wishing you a big, happy holiday season. May it be filled with all good things (and lots of hot cocoa!).

Here’s wishing you a joyous new year. It’s the beginning of a grand new adventure. I hope many amazing things happen for you in the year(s) to come.

All my love,

Your Holiday Mom, Theresa

Xoxo

35 comments

  1. Oliver says:

    Dear holiday mom,
    Thank you so much for taking the time to write this loving letter for kids much like myself, who don’t feel as if they are loved by anyone because of their gender expression or sexual orientation. It means a lot to me especially, since I’ve been practically disowned for coming as out transgender. It’s been really hard, and I really did need this letter this holiday season. Thank you for giving me the love that I’ve been missing.

    Your holiday child,
    Oliver

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Oliver,

      I am so sorry that you were disowned. Like I said in my letter, I know firsthand how hard that is.

      Please know that you are loved by all of the moms here, all holiday season. And please know that after the holidays end, we will still love you. Especially me. I will love you day after day, whether it’s the spring, summer, or the holidays. Any time you need a reminder of that, please read this again. And if you need a fresh dose, just comment. I have notifications going to my email so that I never miss out when one of my kids needs me. Now, I’m not going to lie, I’m sort of terrible at checking my email, so it might be a couple of days, but I will always respond, and I will give you hugs and love whenever you need them.

      Again, I am so sorry. I feel that gender expression and sexual orientation is never a legitimate reason not to love someone. You are worthy and deserving of love. And I am so honored and happy to give you heaping amounts of it. ♥

      Lots and lots of hugs and love!

      ~Mom Theresa

  2. Arryona says:

    Dear Holiday Mom,
    Your letter made me feel welcomed and accepted finally. I would love to meet you because your letter really touched me, I was crying while I reading it. I havent came out to my family nor my mom because Im afraid they’re going to look at me differently. I dont think they understand that I am forever myself.
    Thank you so much!
    With much love,
    Arryona

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Hi Arryona,

      It makes my heart so happy to know that I touched you. You just touched me with your words. Thank you so much for that. Knowing that I made you feel welcome and accepted is just phenomenal. I feel so honored to have been able to do that for you.

      I hope that if and when you do talk to your family that they love and accept you for exactly who you are. Just know that you have all of us here that love, support, and accept you exactly the way that you are. You were made perfectly and we are so thrilled to have you be a part of our family.

      A quote that I love (so much so that I have printed it and put it on my inspiration board because it resonates with me so much) is this:

      “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.” Joubert Botha

      I thought that might be something that would help, so I wanted to share. It always helps me when the people around me don’t understand who I am.

      Sending you so much love right back, and very big hugs!
      ~Mom Theresa

  3. Amya says:

    So I haven’t come out the my parents yet that I’m pansexual & genderfluid but I feel like i my mom especially would disown me cuz of who I am but I feel like one of these moms on here probably you can help me feel better about who I am & make me happy
    Sorry I’m not good at conversations that much & I’m weird

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Amya,

      You’re in luck! I speak fluent weird and weird in general is one of my favorite things. Really. I’m a writer and as such I have a lot of strange things pop into my head constantly. So we’re in good company with each other!

      I hope so much that your parents respond in a positive way when you do talk with them about who you are. If things don’t go as well as I or you would hope, there are so many moms right here that genuinely do love you. Yes, we write open letters but we do it to touch each individual soul, because we love each individual soul so much.

      Just remember that you are an amazing person, headed to do amazing things. You are accepted for exactly who you are right here, and supported. And so very loved.

      Sending you big squishy hugs and a whole lot of love,

      Mom Theresa

    • Aunt Theresa says:

      Hi Jackie,

      I’m so happy you found it at the right moment! I hope it is helpful in all of the times you need it. ♥

      Hugs!

      ~Aunt Theresa

  4. Shelly says:

    Dear Mom Theresa,

    Thank you for the Beautiful Manifesto and the words of encouragement, I will lock it up inside of me, I promise.

    Thank you for accepting me the way I am.

    Sending Warm Holiday Wishes your way.

    Love Shelly

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Hi Shelly,

      I most certainly do accept you just the way you are. I think you’re perfect exactly as you are right this moment. ♥

      It makes my heart so happy to know you will lock up my words inside of you. I hope that they give you strength whenever you need it, and that they act as a reminder of just how much you are loved. Especially by me.

      Thank you for the warm wishes, I wish you the same this holiday season!

      Hugs and much love to you,

      ~Mom Theresa

  5. Maddi says:

    I feel so loved reading these and sometimes I cry. I want to spread this to every one. Thank you Holiday Moms for being there to get me through some of these times, this time of year especially.

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Hi Maddi,

      I’m so glad that you feel so loved when you read these. I am so happy to hear that because I really tried to pack as much love as I possibly could into this letter for you. To know it’s working makes my heart so happy!

      I’m so glad we are here for you when you need us.We have love and hugs for you whenever you want.

      Much love to you, Maddi and very big hugs!

      ~Mom Theresa

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Cassidy,

      Ooh! I felt that one! A big, snuggly warm hug! Thank you so much for that! I like giving them just as much as I receiving them!

      All my love,

      ~Mom Theresa

  6. Gabby says:

    The manifesto is honestly going to be so helpful to me when I memeorize it. Because truth be told, there are many many times where I don’t believe those things about myself at all. Hopefully by repeating them, I’ll start to believe them, at least a little bit. Thank you so much for this.

    Love, Gabby

    • Angelic says:

      Hi sweet Gabby,
      If you “don’t believe” those things, it’s probably because you do believe the opposite. It’s really as simple as deciding to believe, but most of us don’t know how. Someday you’ll have the right combination of tools & then you’ll be unstoppable! I’m very proud of you for joining us, for deciding to memorize Mom Theresa’s manifesto to do something about your lack of faith.

      There are so many of us here who believe in you and love you. I hope you also will return throughout the season.
      Love, Mama Angelic

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Hi Gabby,

      I hope that you do begin to believe those things about yourself, because I believe them for you, very much so.

      I do believe that when you repeat kind, loving thoughts towards yourself, that it does change the way that you think and feel about yourself. I hope that that is true for you!

      Feel free to add to it, too. Make it specific. Make it your own. If you happen to be the best dancer you know, or have the most amazing eyes, make sure you compliment yourself on those traits, too.

      Sending lots of love and hugs your way!

      ~Mom Theresa

  7. Bandit says:

    I want to try and read this as much as I can. This letter really helps me because I haven’t come out to my parents yet and I want to know by myself that I am worthy of being treated nicely. I don’t have to fit any molds. I really appreciate this. Thank you. :)

    • Angelic says:

      Hi Bandit,

      I hope you get very confident in your worth regardless of how parents or family or others respond to you. Therr is so much good & nice in the world hoping you will discover it. Thank you very much for joining our holiday celebration here. It just wouldn’t be the same without you.
      Love, Mama Angelic

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Hi Bandit,

      It touches my heart and makes me so happy that this is helping you. Thank you for sharing that with me.

      I sincerely hope that when you do come out to your parents that everything goes well. And yes, please know your worth. I think that is so important. You are worthy of kindness, of compassion, of respect, of love. You are worthy of all wonderful things you can imagine.

      And you are absolutely correct, you do not need to fit into any molds. If you want to know the truth, all of my favorite people are the ones that don’t fit into molds. ♥

      So much love coming your way!

      ~Mom Theresa

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Hi Angela,

      I guess it’s true what they say: that when you send love out into the world it will come back to you.

      Thank you so much for the kind words and wish. That filled my heart right up and put a very big smile on my face. ♥

      Big hugs! Love you right back!

      ~Mom Theresa

  8. Caitlyn says:

    This manifesto is beautiful. This is so helpful to me right now. I’m facing a lot of adversity from extended family members. They are the small town, right wing, conservative type. I don’t exactly fit their mold. I’m probably going to read this daily as a reminder that I am perfect just as I am.

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Caitlyn,

      That makes me so happy! I’m so glad that this can help you out, and I am honored that you’d read it every day.

      I hope that each time you read it you feel stronger and stronger, and I hope that it is a great reminder of just how loved you are.

      I’m so sorry that you aren’t fitting the mold of family members. I often find myself in the same boat. Just keep remembering how special and unique you are the way that you are, that you are destined to do great things, and that not fitting into that mold could just be one of your greatest strengths (I know it’s one of mine).

      Big love!

      ~Mom Theresa

    • Angelic says:

      Hi Caitlyn,

      I’m so glad you’re here. Sorry to hear about your extended family. You definitely ARE perfect just as you are.
      Like Mom Theresa wrote, not fitting into that mold is a strength.
      Much love, Mama Angelic

  9. May says:

    I’ve tried to explain to other people what being disowned feels like and they just never really understand. They even think that maybe I’m just making it up, because no parent would ever be that cruel. Thank you for acknowledging the struggle of going through that, and for letting me know that one day I will find a way to heal. I think the hardest part about the experience is never feeling like you will move on.

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Hi May,

      My heart goes out to you. I’m so sorry you don’t have people around you that can understand what it feels like, or even acknowledge that is has really happened. I think for a lot of people it is a difficult concept to really empathize with unless they have been through it themselves.

      And I am so very sorry that you are going through it right now, right in the thick of it. I do sincerely hope that you can heal and that the journey to healing is swift.

      It is hard to move on. It’s a life changing event, and as such it’s not something we can heal from in a short amount of time. But keep taking it day by day. The pain lessens. I hate to say this, because I wish the opposite, but the pain never really does go away. But, it does lessen. It even lessens to the point that I can go days without even remembering that it happened.

      Now, I only say this to offer support and hope. If I could get to a place of healing, I certainly think you will be able to, too. And I send you lots and lots of hugs and love to aid you in your healing.

      Sending you big love!

      ~Mom Theresa

    • Angelic says:

      Dear May,

      So sorry to hear that you have been disowned. When a parent disowns a child, it is Always Always Always a failure & lacking of the parent. The challenge for you is learning & believing that you are not at all responsible or unworthy. How sad for them to miss out on more you in their lives. I can tell from your letter & the fact that you are participating on this site that you are a survivor and you definitely have what it take to move on! You are really amazing & special. Thank you so much for sharing with us. I love you very much.
      Big hugs, Mama Angelic

  10. Dylan says:

    I had put my email on this site last year around this time when I adopted mom had disowned me. It helped me through the season seeing all these moms that care so much. This year even though I have reunited with my birth mom I still love seeing this site.
    I love everything about this site.
    It’s amazing!
    The amount of people that must feel overjoyed seeing these emails pop up everyday.
    Keep up the great work!

    • Mom Carin says:

      Dylan!

      Congratulations on reuniting with your birth Mom! I hope you both treasure each and every day. We are here, and we still love you and are proud of your growth this year.

      Much love!
      Mom Carin

    • Mom Theresa says:

      Dylan,

      Thank you so much for coming back! We love having you here. :)

      Thank you for the kind words! I think I speak for all the moms here when I say that we really love doing this. I can’t even put into words the gratitude I have for being able to participate in a project like this. Knowing that I helped even one person is the best feeling ever.

      I’m so happy that you have been able to reunite with your birth mom and I hope that you have a lovely holiday season.

      Big love and hugs to you!

      ~Mom Theresa

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