Holiday Mom: Fiona

ball and treeHappy holidays my beautiful, dear, sweet, holiday child.

How are you today? Are you getting enough to eat? Sleep? Are you drinking enough water? What about dressing for the weather? I’m sorry; it’s the mom in me. I have to ask. As your holiday mom I reserve the right to worry about you. To care about you; to love you. If you are anything like your holiday brother and sister you are rolling your eyes at me right now. That’s ok. It won’t change anything. I still love you, and I’ll always worry.

How have the holidays been for you? I hope you are able to enjoy the festive season. Come get a drink. Do you want eggnog? Help yourself to whatever you’d like. We have cookies, finger foods, desserts, fruits and veggies for everyone to enjoy. Don’t be shy. Take what you want. There is plenty for everyone.

Let’s go sit in the family room. The tree is lit, and music is playing. Do you have a favorite holiday song? Mine is Happy Xmas by John Lennon. There’s something about that song that just speaks to me. Feel free to play whatever song you want, everyone gets a turn.

It looks like it’s time to open some presents. Don’t worry; I know there is a present or two under the tree for you. Don’t look at me that way; of course we got you something. Why wouldn’t we? Don’t get your hopes too high though, at least one person every year gets a homemade sweater that is, how shall I say this – ugly. Your holiday dad is passing you a beautifully wrapped present. The shiny red box with the green ribbon almost looks too beautiful to open. You do the honors and see what’s inside. There is a toque, gloves, scarf set, as well as some warm socks. This is so you will always feel warm, and know that when you wear them, we are with you. I hope you like them. Oh look, here’s a small blue envelope for you. Don’t be shy, open it. Inside are some gift cards for groceries, food, clothes. Also there are some pieces of paper. On each piece is a word: Love, Courage, Beauty and Acceptance. I’m sure you are confused as to what these are, and are for. With each piece of paper, I want you to see what we see. I want you to know that you are loved, for exactly who you are. Know that you are courageous. It takes courage to be true to oneself, and you have courage in spades. Beauty – there is beauty in you. You are a beautiful gift, and we are so happy to have you with us. Acceptance, this is our gift to you. We accept you. You are enough. You are who you are, and who you are is wonderful.

Oh look, there’s another gift for you. It’s a gift bag with bright colors. I watch your face as you open it. I can’t help but smile as you pull out the annual ugly sweater. Put it on. It’s given with love. This means you are one of us. Welcome, and happy holidays. We are so glad you are here.

Love always,

Your holiday mom, Fiona

 

53 comments

  1. Wenxin says:

    Hi mom :)
    Thk u for the ugly sweater…no matter how ugly it is, it’ll always warm my heart to finally be accepted by someone. I’ve spent years being told that no one will ever want me. Thk u for caring. I hope to stop by next year too. And mom…Is my cat welcome too? >.<
    Love,
    Your holiday daughter,
    Wenxin

    • Fiona says:

      Welcome Wenxin, and welcome to your cat too. Of course you are both welcome! Never doubt for a minute about our acceptance of you. We love you for exactly who you are, and we accept you.
      I hope to see you next year, and for many years to come.
      Take care beautiful Wenxin.
      Your holiday mom, Fiona

      • Wenxin says:

        Mom:
        You don’t know what it means for me to hear (read?) that. I never felt loved. My real dad left when I was young and I haven’t heard from him since. My biological mother always told me it was wrong to be…well…me. Even at a young age…I’ve spent years with a penknife as my best friend…I think you understand what I’m trying to say by that. I’ve attempted suicide before. But even when my school counsellor called home to tell her I needed help…she refused to believe her…and just yelled at me for being attention seeking. I never got to speak much to anyone…I was shy and bullied physically, online, and verbally…so I never made many friends. It took me a long while before I made a few friends who stayed with me…and I found this site too…which made me feel and still makes me feel that I have made contact with many long-lost relatives or somethg. It took me even longer before I learnt to smile again…depression took over a large part of my life. I’m glad I found you mom. Thank you for loving me. I love you<3.

        Love,
        Your holiday daughter,
        Wenxin

        • Fiona says:

          Wenxin, We are all so happy that you are with us. It saddens me to read how unhappy and unloved you have felt. I’m hoping you feel that way no more. You are a beautiful, wonderfully amazing gift. We accept you, and we wouldn’t want you to be anyone you aren’t. It wouldn’t be you, and we want the true you. We see you, we hear you, and we accept you.
          I’m so glad you are part of us. You have a huge support system here, and your holiday family (dad, brother, sister and me) root for you every day. Be you! You are a star!!
          Love,
          Your holiday mom, Fiona

          • Wenxin says:

            Mom:
            Do you think my holiday siblings would like me…? I never had siblings…I’ve always been an only child. This is new to me…then again…having a family is new to me. I turn 15 in January…so where do I stand age wise…? Where do I even stand in this holiday family…? I’ve spent my life getting bullied…beaten up…yelled at. Being cared about is a whole new experience. If it doesn’t bother you…can you tell me more? I’d like to visualise it :). I’m sorry for disturbing you, mom.
            Love,
            Your holiday daughter,
            Wenxin

        • Fiona says:

          Wenxin, You are never a bother, and are not disturbing anything. I welcome your questions, and enjoy telling you about us. Everyone deserves to feel valued. I want you to know that you are loved. You are valued and respected.
          Your holiday brother is 17, and your holiday sister is 13. Your holiday dad is an only child, and through him I can appreciate and understand how hard it can be without siblings.
          About this holiday family – first and foremost bullying & disrespect of any kind simply isn’t tolerated. There’s too much negativity in the world for us to waste time being anything but positive.
          Your holiday siblings argue, and tease one another but it’s always done with love. They don’t care about your sexual orientation, your preferences, your gender, age, color, religion etc. They only care that you are happy. They want you to know that they think you are ok just the way you are. Don’t change for anyone else. Be you. They like who you really are.
          Take care of yourself. There is only one you.
          Love,
          Your holiday mom, Fiona

  2. Tom says:

    hi mom fiona
    your letter after reading it i had tears in my eyes it was so sweet and something i could only dream of hearing. the bit about the sweater made me laugh. i will wear it and hold it every time i feel alone. i came out as a transgender (ftm) ages ago back when i was 13 but nothing ever got taken seriously and now im 19 and it still never seems to be taken seriously happiness or family i have been having that in my head everyday and i hope to soon get away from home soon and live with my boyfriend and then i can start focusing on finally going doctors for help christmas just dont seem to be good this year to me . i guess i just need someone to hug or cry to. but your letter made me so happy and made me wish i had a family like that but i dont see it ever happening but your words will run threw my head all night hopefully tonight will be the one night where i dont cry to sleep
    Love your Holiday Child,
    tom

    • Fiona says:

      My dear sweet Tom, I would like to give you a hug right now. Anytime you want to cry, talk, or sit in silence, I am with you. You are never alone, as you are in my heart.
      Everytime you look at the sweater, feel the love that comes with it, as well as the warmth and the comfort.
      Your courage and bravery makes me so proud. I love you Tom and I will never get tired of giving you hugs and seeing that beautiful smile on your face.
      As you go to bed tonight and every other night, no more tears. Don’t cry beautiful boy.
      Good sleep, good dreams Tom.
      I love you always.
      Your holiday mom, Fiona

      • Tom says:

        good morning mom
        for once i had a lovely sleep with a happy dream, i would love to have loads of hugs with you. i am glad you are with me just wish it was in person and i will always cuddle the sweater and feel true happiness. my courage and bravery comes and goes depending on how i feel i have depression with is hard to control but thanks to having you mom you make me feel alot more confident. i love you too mom and ill always cherish our hugs and i am surprised i dont smile often but i cant stop smiling now.
        i hope you had a good sleep or good day depending on time zone i love you always too
        your holiday son, tom

        • Fiona says:

          Hello Tom, I’m so happy that you had a lovely sleep and a happy dream. That made my day :)
          I hope that you can start smiling more, your smile is beautiful and lights up the world.
          I wish you more nights of peaceful sleep and many more happy dreams.
          Good sleep good dreams always.
          Love you forever,
          your holiday mom Fiona

          • Tom says:

            morning i had another peaceful night. i am glad it made your day. i have been smilling alot more then normal which has made me feel alot better. its alot nicer being called my name. oh and i have two questions what is eggnog? i have never tried it or seen it. do you play any games at Christmas?
            Good sleep sweet dreams
            Love you forever,
            your holiday son tom

        • Fiona says:

          Good morning Tom, I had to reply up here because I wasn’t able to reply to your last comment. I’ll never get tired of hearing about you, and seeing you smile. I love your smile, it looks so good on you :)
          Eggnog is a drink made up of eggs, cream, and flavorings. You can also add alcohol if you want. I like to add cinnamon to mine. It can be an acquired taste. As for games, yes we play many games at Christmas. Clue, Monopoly, Charades, Uno, Pictionary, you name it, and we will play it. Don’t be surprised if your holiday brother and sister want to be on your team. They love spending time with you, and always want to be teammates with you.
          Love you forever,
          your holiday mom Fiona

          • Tom says:

            hi mom
            i am so happy you think my smile looks good and eggnog sounds funny i mean i have like fried egg and stuff i dont think i could imagine drinking it but maybe one day ill try it, as for games monopoly is my favorite game but i love all games it makes it fun. how old is my holiday brother and sister ? what are my holiday dad, brother and sister names ? sorry if im being nosey i love asking questions, so mom do you have any questions for me ?
            love you all always
            your holiday son
            tom

        • Fiona says:

          Hi Tom, Let me introduce you to the family: your holiday dad is Stephen. He looks intimidating like a big grizzly bear, but inside he has the soft heart of a teddy bear. He loves his family and is a good dad. Your holiday brother is 17. His name is Noah. He is a good kid, who can sometimes find himself in some not so good situations due to his friends. He likes to help others, and would give anyone the shirt off his back. Your holiday sister is 13 year old Isabella. She is feisty, and outspoken. She is headstrong, and isn’t afraid to stand up to things that she thinks are wrong. She’s a handful, but in the best way possible. Although there are times when I get tired of reasoning with her (did I mention that she’s a bit headstrong :))
          Tom, I have all kinds of questions for you: Tell us whatever you feel comfortable sharing. Tell us about your boyfriend. What are your hopes and dreams?
          Keep smiling – always!
          your holiday mom, Fiona

          • Tom says:

            hi mom, dad, sister , brother you all have beautiful names. loads of hugs for everyone. have you’s every played i spy or hide n seek. my boyfriends name is chris his 23 he is rather the quiet type he keeps to himself, we have our issues at times but we have been together 2years n 6 months but he lives in Manchester and im from london so its been like 6 months since his been here he spoils me as for me my hopes and dreams is that one day ill have enough courage to talk to people and try get a job and go get this transformation thing sorted i mean i used to overdose and cut but so far thats under control, i wish i could be me and not wake up and just be me i mean my boyfreind is trying to help by buying me a binder and a packer to help me even though my parents wont know about that but my main dream is just to feel happy with myself. whats your views on piercings and tattoos ? i am open about everything even the bad in my life i love answering questions
            love you all always
            hugs all around
            your holiday son tom x

        • Fiona says:

          Hi Tom,
          I spy and hide & seek are games that are played all year long. I spy especially. It’s easy to play anywhere, and it is so much fun for all of us.
          What kind of job would you like to get? I know you can do anything. You have it in you, all you have to do is trust yourself.
          I’m proud of you Tom. I want you to look at yourself in the mirror and say “I’m proud of me”, “I’m worthy” because I want you to know this to the core of your being. Feel your self worth.
          Please Tom, no more cutting or overdosing. There is only one you, and we don’t want you hurt, and we don’t want to lose you.
          Do you have any tattoo’s or piercings? We are ok with them. Your holiday dad has a tattoo and is planning on getting another. Your holiday brother wants to get a sleeve done. As for piercings, again, anything is fine. The only rule is that any tattoo’s or piercings are done safely, from a reputable business.
          Take care Tom.
          Love you forever,
          Your holiday mom Fiona

          • Tom says:

            hi mom
            hope everything is okay there. i love hide and seek especially like sometimes if we cant play cause not many hiding places so we find maybe a item and hide it and we got to guess wear it could be. as for cutting and that so far i haven’t and im going to keep being strong. tattoos and piercings oh might be stuck there. tattoos i got 5 im hoping to get two sleeves i get them done by a good tattoo shop erm piercings however i have 5 all in my ears but i done them myself as i hate others doing it. i mainly draw my tattoos. so what kind of tattoo does dad have or is getting and what kind of sleeve does brother want (tribal,machine,pattern) as for a job erm i would like to either get a stay at home job that i can do online or something to do with drawing or writting books. what kind of music does everyone like ?
            Take care mom.
            Love you all forever,
            Your holiday son tom

  3. Holiday Sister Lisa says:

    Hi Holiday Mom Fiona! Thank you for your welcome letter and warm words (and sweater.) My family was never like this, and with my mom gone these 11 years, and my closest sibling dead (from suicide…he was Trans f2m), there is no hope for it to ever be like this. I was not accepted by 99% of my immediate family as a lesbian, and there was no physical interactions indicative of love (hugs, hand-holding.) Mom fed us well, but had no time for any other parenting skills. Dad was abusive, and still is, so I live 150 miles away and have no contact with him. My partner is disabled, and she, our dog, 2 cats and 3 birds are it for family. It is very hard for me to make friends, so knowing that we can be included in your family’s celebrations is awesome! I will bring a tray of Christmas cookies, especially the Brown-eyed Susan (mint wafer center) that I adore!

    For Ru and I, being included in a family for Christmas is water to our thirsty hearts. Thank you! God bless!

    Your holiday sister,
    Lisa

    • Fiona says:

      Welcome Lisa! Thank you for joining us, and bringing your partner and all your animal babies. All are welcome in our home.
      As I was reading your words, the first thing that came to mind was thank you for sharing your story. You are being heard. I am happy to listen.
      While you may not have the picture perfect family (and really who does) it sounds like you have a fabulous family with your partner and your animals.
      Don’t worry about making friends Lisa – here there are no strangers. We are all friends. We are safe.
      Keep in mind that we stand with you. We share in your joy, and will encourage you to keep going day after day. You are an amazing person, and we are forever grateful you are with us, now and always.
      If I can give you anything this Christmas it would be for you to know that I love you. I see you. I hear you and I accept you.
      God Bless you Lisa & Ru and your entourage.
      Loving wishes, your holiday mom Fiona
      PS – Thank you for the Christmas cookies. They are a favorite :)

      • Holiday Sister Lisa says:

        Dear Holiday Mom,

        Thank you. I wish I had heard those words, and felt that support as a child or even a young adult. My inner child and me are just soaking that love up! It has seemed that no matter how much I feel I am out of the closet, many circumstances each day conspires to force me back into a role that I do not fit!
        I lost my Trans brother, my closest sibling, to suicide a little over a year ago. He had many problems, but a huge one was severe PTSD caused by a hate crime-beating he received in a corridor of a hospital where he was being admitted. His loss, 2 years later, has been devasting to me.
        Please, my trans- brothers and sisters, if you are being hurt, or have been hurt because of who you are, GET HELP from a counselor, or even start with a crisis line. You DO NOT deserve to be hurt. And we all deserve to be reasonably happy and loved for who we are.

        Holiday mom, I hope it was ok to share that here. I am holding your hand this Christmas season, and we will put up a stocking for you Christmas eve.

        Your holiday daughter,
        Lisa

        • Fiona says:

          Lisa, Of course it is more than ok to share here. Always! My sincere sympathies for your loss. I’m glad you shared this with us. If it’s ok with you, we will light a candle for your brother, as he will be with us in spirit. He won’t be forgotten.
          I’m so proud to hold your hand and share the season with you.
          Hugs from your holiday mom, Fiona

          • Holiday Sister Lisa says:

            Thank you! I’m crying a bit today reading your reply. I, too, will light a candle for him. Thank you dear Holiday Mom for the hand to hold, and for all the love that you are sharing with so many here! You and this website, and all the other moms, are truly a blessing in this world! ♡ Lisa

  4. Sam says:

    Dear holiday mom Fiona,
    Thank you. It’s currently midnight and I was just about to fall asleep but I decided to stay up a little bit longer. I stumbled across this blog and your letter was the first one I’ve read. So now I’m sitting here, crying because I’ve received more love in a letter from a stranger than from my own parents. When I came out as a pansexual transboy, my parents have expressed their hatred of anything that has to do with queerness. Luckily, I’ve been allowed to live under their roof but I’m afraid that will end when I turn 18 in few months.
    Upon reading your letter, I was overwhelmed. The amount of love and warmth that you have to offer made me, quite literally, cry and I just wanted to say thank you for taking the time to do this. There’s tons of people out there that are similar, and worse, situations as me and I can only imagine how many people you’ve touched with your kind words.

    Thank you again and I hope you have an amazing holiday season,
    your holiday son, Sam.

    • Fiona says:

      My courageous holiday son Sam – Thank you for your kind words. If you don’t mind I’d like to dry your eyes, give you a hug and see you with a beautiful smile on your face.
      You are so special to me, and to all of us here.
      It’s hard for me as a parent to understand how other parents treat their kids, I wish we could just all love our children for the gifts that they are. Deep down I have to believe that they love you, and in time I am hopeful that they will become informed and change their stance.
      In the meantime you be you. There is nothing wrong with you, and my sweet boy, you have more courage and grace than you realize.
      I would love to wrap all my holiday kids (and my biological ones) up in a hug and make sure that they never feel an ounce of pain. Please know that even though you get hurt, you are on this earth for a reason. You have purpose. You are perfectly wonderful, and I wouldn’t change a thing about you.
      Thank you Sam for being with us, we will cherish you always.
      Loving you always, your holiday mom Fiona

  5. Christina says:

    thank you, mom, for welcoming me into your holiday traditions (which, by the way, all sound very very fun; i look forward to enjoying christmas carols as they echo throughout your home.. my personal favorite would have to be either hayley kiyoko’s cover of ‘jolly old saint nicholas’ or ‘christmas unicorn’ by sufjan stevens- i highly recommend you give them a listen!!)! you probably figured this out already, since im writing a comment on this site at all, but christmas is not the easiest time of year for me. i mean, there are definitely people who have it worse off than i do (that is to say im in no immediate physical danger for who i am, which not everyone can say! :( ) , but as a teenage closeted poly lesbian it gets hard to know that most people who show me love this time of year arent loving me for who i am but rather who they believe me to be. it makes me want to feel like im a disappointment because i like girls, which i know shouldnt be true!! i have to keep reminding myself that theres nothing wrong with me, that anyone who believes something of that variety is wrong. but outside of my computer im surrounding almost entirely by conservative christian bigotry, so my constant reminders that im ok are like a small dim candle in a big dark room, or like a drop of water in a huge bucket of red paint. im not gonna lie, its awful. but, these letters have really and truly been helping me!! you, fiona, as well as all the other lovely moms whose letters have passed or are to come have been a HUGE wncouragement!! i feel important, needed, loved!! i can never thank you enough for providing me with this warm feeling in my chest, but i can try!! thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouTHANKYOUUU!! youre the greatest comfort i could ever have asked for. i love you, and i hope to someday have a positive role model like you in my life offline..
    hugs,
    ❤️christina!!!❤️

    • Fiona says:

      Christina you are a bright ray of light. I am so touched that you took the time to write.
      First off I have to tell you that I was raised in a very conservative Catholic household. I was raised to believe that anything other than a man/woman relationship was a sin, and morally wrong. I knew from a very young age that I didn’t agree with that. I have always felt like a person should love whomever they want, as long as it’s a healthy, happy love for all parties involved. I’m happy to report Christina that my very staunch Irish Catholic father is now so much more open minded. He still goes to church and has his beliefs but he now feels like everyone should have the right to marry regardless of sexual orientation,. I’m telling you this because if my dad can change his unchangeable opinion, then maybe in time your family will to. I hope you will one day feel free to be who you really are. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you.Whenever you feel alone please think of me and all the other wonderful people here and understand you have a support like no other.
      I’d like to give you a hug and tell you it will all get better.
      Here in our house you are welcome and invited to be you. You are unique and so very special to me.
      I wish you good health, happiness and peace.
      Happy Holidays my darling Christina!
      PS – thanks for the music tip. I love listening to music and learning of new artists.

  6. Natalie says:

    Hi Holiday mom, Fiona,
    It is about 8 pm and I’ve just read your letter and seeing that someone really care about me and loves me means a lot to me. I have been out as gay for a very long time and my birth mother has been less than supportive.. abusive at some points. I was recently sexually assaulted and as a result ended up pregnant and then lost my beautiful twins to a miscarriage in October. My birth mother treated me terribly after everything was said and done. She used the situation to “prove” that I’m straight and then basically told me I was a slut. She told me I couldn’t tell any of my family about what happened because of how poorly it would reflect on her.. I couldn’t handle all this negativity surrounding me while I was trying to deal with my loss. I decided to use all my money to move 12 hours away from her and closer to the rest of my family. Unfortunately everyone else has shut me out and I’m living with a friend and her family where I frequently feel like a burden.I’m so sorry, this message is incredibly long. I just feel so alone, I have no one to talk to anymore. I have to get up at 5 am tomorrow for my first day at my new job as a security officer and I’m really nervous I’m going to make a fool of myself.. I’m going to try to get some sleep so I wake up on time. Thank you for listening to me go on like this and thank you so much for caring when my own family will not.
    Love always,
    your holiday daughter Natalie

    • Fiona says:

      Hello Natalie! Welcome. I’d like to take the time to give you my sympathies for all you have been through. I’m sending you a loving, healing hug. And please never, ever apologize for being long winded. I love that you can talk to me, and all the other wonderful holiday moms.
      I don’t know if words can ever take away the hurt. It’s not fair or right the way you have been treated. I sense you are a survivor, and you will always be victorious in life. It may seem like the chips are down right now, but I’d like to tell you that often times when things look gloomy, the sun shines at exactly the right moment. Your moment of sunshine is coming.
      I’m so grateful to your friend and her family for providing you shelter and comfort in your time of need. Don’t ever feel like a burden, You are a gift, a beautiful treasure and deserve to be treated as such.
      Good for you for getting a job. That’s a fantastic accomplishment. You are not going to make a fool of yourself. You are going to go to work, you are going to do the best that you can do, and you are going to hold your head up high, all the while knowing that you are someone of value. You have worth, and you are an important part of this world.
      Good sleep, good dreams Natalie – for tomorrow is a brand new day full of amazing possibilities.
      I’m tucking you in and sending you a great big mom hug.
      Loving you forever, your holiday mom – Fiona

  7. Kate says:

    I love this letter, and it makes me cry seeing the care you have for us here. I see the replies down in these comments and I see a reply to each and every one, which shows how much you care, just like family should.

    It hits me real hard because just recently my immediate family took a bigger stance against me and I am now moving a few cities away because the stress of dealing according to their expectations is so high. They will never accept me as their daughter and they only want me in their presence if it’s as their son. So I basically lost my family just before the holiday season all started.

    Reading these letters and comments reminds me of what I lost but it shows that there are people who care out there, and for that I can never be more grateful.

    Thank you,
    With love from your holiday daughter,
    Kate

    • Fiona says:

      To my beautiful holiday daughter Kate, Thank you for joining us and for bringing your wonderful spirit. I’m so sorry you are having such difficulties. It is never easy, but as the holidays draw closer, it can be overwhelming.
      Let me tell you something Kate – you are exactly who you are meant to be. From the bottom of my heart I want you to hear what I’m saying to you: You are a wonderful, beautiful soul. I’m so delighted that you are one of my holiday children, and we are ever so thankful for you.
      If I could take all your hurt away, I would. I am sending you a warm hug, I hope it helps.
      It’s an honor and a privilege to be your holiday mom. Thank you.
      You dear sweet perfect girl, I send you all my love and I wish you all the best.
      You are in my heart now and always.
      Your holiday mom, Fiona

    • Holiday Ciocia says:

      Kate,

      I’m living (more than a few) cities away from my family too… I wish we could hang out for a day and do something fun, maybe go to a local attraction or a holiday concert, whatever is fun for you. It could be our new tradition.

      Sending lots more hugs from your holiday auntie.

      • Kate says:

        Hi Aunt Ciocia,

        I don’t remember ever going to any attractions or concerts during the holiday season. But I’ve been trying a lot of new things lately and I would love to make a new tradition. I think it would have to include baking some goodies though.

        *hugs*

        Kate

  8. Marshall says:

    Hi mom Fiona! I’m one of your many holiday sons, Marshall. I read your letter early this morning while getting ready for school. It gave me a bit of happiness to start off the day before returning to the horrors of high school. The social life here is fine, everyone is very accepting, but the work is a buttload. I’ve never had an ugly christmas sweater (I don’t have any sweaters that I wear since I am not allowed to shop in the guys section), so thank you from the bottom of my heart. I’m sitting in the corner, by the Christmas tree, jotting down plot and poem ideas in my Tolkien themed moleskin notebook. I’ve been having a bit of a difficult time at my house, where my biological mom isn’t very accepting, so thank you for accepting me into your warm and loving home. Do you mind if I put on some Halsey? She’s my all time favorite musician at the moment, but since I’ve been listening to her music 24/7 for the past month I may go back to My Chemical Romance in a few days. Thank you so much for welcoming me into your home.
    Your holiday son,
    Marshall

    • Fiona says:

      Welcome Marshall! We love having you here. Of course you can put Halsey on, you can put My Chemical Romance on too – as long as I get to play Happy Xmas one more time 😉
      You are most welcome for the sweater. I hope you enjoy it, and know when you wear it how amazing you look.
      I’m sorry things are difficult for you right now. Your biological mother loves you. I have a 17 year old son, and a 13 year old daughter (your holiday brother & sister). As the mother of two teens, I can tell you it is difficult. There is nothing that they can tell me that would make me love them any less. I may not like what I hear, but I’m always happy to listen. Give your mother some time, and she may surprise you. Try to stay positive.
      I want you to know that we are thankful for you Marshall. You are a joy and a Blessing.
      Thank you for being with us, and know that nothing you do or say will make a difference to us. You are one of us, you are accepted, you are loved.
      Please take care of yourself, and remember how special you are.
      Loving wishes, your holiday mom – Fiona

  9. Layla says:

    Hello.
    This website has made me undoubtably happy. Just reading this brought me to tears, knowing that there are such kind people. I have recently discovered myself to be pansexual and I have a continuous urge to tell my family but cannot due to a constant fear of rejection. My younger sister has already expressed her opinion on homosexuals and bisexuals on multiple occasions and it has always been negative “I think it’s wrong for two people of the same gender to be together”. I have however told my older sister earlier today and she was accepting of the fact that I am pan but her attitude has changed and she seems to be distancing herself. Because I am in my early teens (13) I fear my mother would say something along the lines of “you are too young to understand your sexuality” or “this is just a phase” but deep down I know it is not just a phase. Also I have multiple family members staying this Christmas and knowing my family, word may spread of my sexuality and I am in fear of being shunned upon. I don’t want to be seen as less of a person by those I love…
    Thank you Holiday Mom, reading this post just made me so happy.
    Happy Holidays
    Love your Holiday daughter
    Layla x

    • Fiona says:

      Sweet Layla, First things first, I must give you a hug. I want to wrap my arms around you and shield you from anything that will hurt you. I can’t say that I know what you are going through, but I can tell you that I have a 13 year old daughter. I think of her as I’m answering this. All I can tell you is what I would tell her, and that is be true to you. Love who you want to love, just make sure it is a healthy, happy love.
      It is hard, and we always want our family to be there for us and love us unconditionally. Sadly that isn’t always the case.
      As your holiday mom, I have to tell you that there is nothing wrong with you. Deep down you know who you are (and I think who you are is wonderful).
      Family can be so difficult to navigate. My heart goes out to you. I wish I had an easy answer for you. You are a beautiful soul. It takes courage to be true to oneself, and at the age of 13 it sounds like you have a grasp of your truth.
      Please let me know how things go for you.
      I’ll be thinking of you this Christmas and I’ll be hugging you to keep you safe and warm.
      Love your holiday mom, Fiona

  10. Zach says:

    I have to say that I have the biggest smile on my face. I’ve never had a warm holiday morning like this, and it feels nice to be thought of, or to be included. I’ve never had an ugly Christmas sweater but I’d wear this one with pride.

    This letter almost made me cry–but in a good way. Thank you for thinking of us. You’re so wonderful!

    • Fiona says:

      Oh Zach, my smile is beaming from ear to ear reading your comment. I’m so glad you are smiling and feeling included. You are a part of our family, and that will never change. You are wonderful Zach. You are beautiful, and I am sending you a hug. If I can give you one thing this Christmas it would be to know how much you are loved and valued.
      Enjoy this wonderful Christmas morning with us, not only this year but for many years to come.
      Love you forever,
      your holiday mom Fiona

    • Fiona says:

      Thank you Calil. I’ll watch you with pride as you wear the sweater. You are a wonderful addition to our holiday family.
      Cheers & good fortune to you now and always.
      Your holiday mom, Fiona

  11. Robert says:

    Purr! Love you. Thank you so much! I can see this as if I was there – and I’m that one weirdo who will wear the ugly sweater all through the holidays especially if it’s garish with holly and snowflakes and reindeer and that. Just think of me as an oversize Tiny Tim at your hearth, walker and all, with a shaggy Siamese cat. If there’s yogurt on the treats table we’re sharing that and he’s purring. He has to have his two bites of yogurt.

    What’s a toque? Hopefully a man hat with ear flaps, I do need to keep warm because of chronic fatigue and temperature sensitive fibromyalgia, so all that fussing and those reminders warm my heart. Thank you.

    I’m sitting there in the corner sketching the whole family together like a Dickens illustration in my travel journal, including self portrait and cat in his Christmas bells harness.

    • Fiona says:

      Oh Robert, you are so precious. Thank you for being a part of our family. A toque is a warm hat. If you want a man hat with ear flaps, then that’s what you’ll get. I have no doubt you will wear it well. As for the sweater, the “uglier” the better. That’s our motto.
      I love that you bring your cat with you. We have 2 cats and 2 dogs. We love all our children (human and animal), and yes – there will be yogurt.
      You are a joy Robert. Your spirit, and warmth radiate. I can’t wait to see your artistic ability in action. Thank you Robert (and your shaggy Siamese cat), for being such wonderful additions to our family.
      Your holiday mom, Fiona

  12. Yaeli says:

    Hello, Holiday mom!
    I take my time to read the new letters, ever since I joined two days ago. They always bring a smile to my face, because I know they are made with love and care.

    I like your choice of song, I agree that John Lennon was a wonderful singer!

    Last night when I saw one of my close friends, I tried to deny that I was romantically attracted to her, because I’ve been raised to think that my sexuality is wrong. Even my parents do not accept that I’m asexual, and like anyone.

    I’m glad about the holiday ugly sweater! At least it keeps me warm, and I can use it for the contest at church!

    Thank you for the letter, holiday mom, and thank you for the words,’Love, Courage, Beauty, and Acceptance.’

    Have a happy holiday!

    • Fiona says:

      Hello Yaeli! Happy Holidays! Welcome to our home. I’m glad you liked the sweater and will find warmth with it. Good luck with the contest at Church.
      It’s hard to explain why people think certain things are wrong. Please know that there is nothing wrong with your sexuality. It is a part of you, and there is nothing at all wrong with you. Sometimes I wonder if people make something ugly and wrong, when they don’t themselves understand it. It’s hard to know why people think and act the way they do, but just take care, and know that deep down you are loved, you are beautiful, you are accepted, and you have courage. When you know these, you will have peace. My wish for you is that you find peace and happiness.
      Thank you for allowing us to be part of your holiday. We are happy you are with us.
      Love you forever,
      your holiday mom, Fiona

  13. May says:

    Thank you for the letter momma Fiona. I am having some difficulties with my mother at the moment and your letter (even the part about the Ugly Chtistmas Sweater) made me smile and feel like I could make it through this weekend (that’s when I have to see her). Thank you again for the hope and courage your words have given me. Happy Holidays.

    Love your Holiday Child,
    May

    • Fiona says:

      Happy Holidays May! I’m so happy that my letter has given you hope. I wish you all the best this weekend with your mother. Please know that when you are dealing with someone who isn’t the easiest to deal with, or has their own issues, all you can control is you. No matter what issues there are between you and your mother, she loves you. She may not know how to deal with things, or she may not want to deal with things, I really don’t know. But do yourself a favor and remember that kindness is the greatest wisdom. Remember that she loves you, and that you have a support system here who love and accept you as well. You are never alone. You have courage May, you have so much courage. I’ll be thinking of you this weekend, and I’ll hope for the best.
      Love you always, your holiday mom, Fiona

  14. Christina says:

    Oh Fionna, your letter makes me want to be your Holiday Child :) I hope that everyone who reads your post will feel the love and sense of inclusion that I feel when I read it. Blessings to one and ALL.

    Christina

    • Fiona says:

      Merry Christmas Christina! You are my Holiday Child, and I am so grateful for the opportunity. I am so thrilled you feel inclusion and love. You are welcome any time. There is always room in our home and at our table. Blessings to you as well beautiful Christina. You are a Blessing to me, and I thank you for that.
      Love your holiday mom, Fiona

  15. Teddy says:

    Dear, Holiday mom Fiona, I’d like to say thank you. Thank you for accepting me and who I am. I usually skip ahead to other Holiday Moms posts, but for some reason I stoped to read yours. And im glad I did. It brought a smile to my face, especially when I got the annual ugly sweater! I’ll cherish it for as long as I can remember. Reading your post eases my heart, knowing that their are people like my Holiday Mom.
    Happy Holidays!
    – Your Holiday Son Teddy

    • Fiona says:

      HI my dear holiday son Teddy! I’m so happy that you read my letter. It warms my heart that it put a smile on your face. Please know that there are many people in this world who love and accept you. I’d like to ask you to remember that you are valued. You are worthy of love and acceptance and so much more. You are one of us, and we are thrilled you are joining us this holiday and for many years to come. Happy Holidays our dear sweet beautiful Teddy!

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