Your Holiday Mom: Mama Aly

Bright Solstice Wishes, My Darling One!

Oh, darling, it’s so good to see you. What? No, I’m not sniffly; I’m just so happy to have you here! You know me — I feel all my feelings Big, including the love I have for you. Thank you for coming to visit us this year!

Are you happy, my Holiday Child? That’s all we want in life for you. There is nothing you could say to us that would make us not love you. And, like a lot of parents, there’s probably some things that we’ve guessed about that you think are a big deal and we think are none of our business until you decide to tell us in your own way and time. Go ahead and take your time; we’ll still be here, loving you, no matter what. Sometimes the worrying stuff can be too big of a weight on our hearts. If you’re wanting to talk and having trouble, let’s celebrate what’s good together and let that lift us!

I finally knit my Pride yarn up into a nice scarf for myself. I made it lacey enough that I’ll be able to wear it on the cooler days in June. (That’s when Pride month is, around here.) When we celebrate Pride, we also celebrate all our loved ones, including you, my dear Holiday Child. We celebrate how far we’ve come, we bolster ourselves for how far we have yet to go, we reaffirm that love is love, and we rejoice in how connected we all really are (even when it seems that we’re oh-so-different). This last Pride month, as Holiday Dad was pointing out a particularly unexpected-and-happy rainbow flag, Kiddo (who has grown about a foot, I’m serious!) asked, “Why does Dad do that? Why do you like rainbows so much, Mom?” I told him, “They’re beautiful. But more than that, did you know that rainbows — those beautiful things — come out after the worst, most frightening storms? That if you’re brave enough to go out, and look towards the light, you might see a rainbow? *That’s* why I love rainbows. Well, and all the cool science, of course.” I had to add that last; Kiddo knows what a science nerd I am!

I’m so proud of you, my brave, loving Holiday Child. Don’t ever give up, darling, even when the storm is the most frightening thing ever. Look toward the light with me. Maybe we’ll see a rainbow together!

Wishing you Love and Light,

Mama Aly


  1. Garren says:

    Happy holidays, Mama Ally!
    Thank you so much for writing. I am a 19 year old, atheist, pansexual, and gender questioning reader who needed your letter more than anything right now. With your kind and brilliant words, I know I can pull through this storm. We can shine through this storm, together. Anybody would be lucky to have such loving, witty, and talented role models as you and Holiday Dad in their lives. I couldn’t thank you two enough for your contribution, so how about big hugs instead?

    Wishing you two a safe and fun holiday,

    PS: I love that scarf! It makes me excited for next Pride!

    • Mama Aly says:

      My Dear Garren,

      We *love* hugs! The bigger, the better. Holiday Kiddo is a big hugger, too, though he tends to run up to a person and then turn around so his back faces them, because he loves the feeling of having someone’s arms wrapped around his shoulders. Isn’t that sweet? Maybe you can even imagine me giving you a good squeezy hug around your shoulders, too. That would be nice, to give you big, big hugs!

      And, come next June, I’ll put on my scarf and go out thinking of you, my Garren! I’m so proud of you!

      So much love,
      Mama Aly

  2. Haze says:

    Hi Mama!

    I found the light today, I found the rainbow. I turned 18 on the 20th. My mom his datemate gave me a card with sticky notes under some layers that said “Happy 18th bday, Claim your name” and under the sticky notes was enough money to change my name, I went in today and got my court date, and Just now am I crying more happy tears, partially because of your letter.

    I’m Asexual, DemiRomantic and ftm Transgender and I couldn’t be happier to share myself and the weight in my heart with you. It’s been a long time coming, finding myself. It’s been one h*** of a storm, but I did it. My rainbow might not look the same as the one after a normal storm, but it is my rainbow and I’m happy to share it.

    Wishing you much love and happiness on the holidays. Remember to appreciate the small things, the small gestures, because in the end that’s what changes everything.

    I love you so much

    • Mama Aly says:

      Haze, my dear!

      Happy birthday! Such a big number, and such a big wonderful thing — to get your court date for your name change! I’m so happy for you, I’m doing a goofy little dance in my kitchen. (Moms are allowed to do silly things like that when they’re happy for their kids, right?) *happy squeals*
      You’re so right, too: it’s the small things — sometimes the smallest of things, even — that break the storm and show us the light. It’s such a blessing to me to have you, dear Haze, and my other Holiday children to share my little light with and to have you all share your light with me.
      I am so, so proud of you, Haze! And I love you *so much*!
      More happy dancing,
      Mama Aly

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